We all have personal needs aside from the usual survival needs in our life. Although every person has different needs to thrive, few people are aware of them. It can be difficult for us to put our finger on them, so let’s figure out how to identify your needs.
Keep a notebook with you or on your nightstand. Jot down the positive things in your life. What brings you happiness? What did you do that made you successful? Now, list the not so good things you’ve experienced.
From this list, what must you have to help you be your best? What’s most important to you? Make sure you’re aware of what you don’t need in your life and what not to do to avoid those negative experiences or rut. Maybe a friend or family member can help you with a need or two. Let’s go through some possible needs.
I need more “me” time. Are you a people pleaser? Do you bend over backwards for your friends and family? Sometimes, it’s exhausting and it sucks the life out of you. Know when to say NO. You need time to refuel and energize by having a good night’s sleep, or getting a massage. Maybe some retail therapy or yoga, or a relaxing pedicure. Pamper yourself with a bath or face mask. Play video games or snuggle with a good book.
Learn something new. It’s never too late to pick up a new skill. It will help build your confidence, and you might discover your new passion. Learn how to use power tools by taking a class in Home Depot or Lowe’s. Take a beginner’s sewing class at JoAnn’s, so you can learn a basic stitch and how to sew a button back on. Try a local cooking class to add new meals to your menu. Sign up for an exercise class you’ve never done but always wanted to take. Go to Paint Nite or take guitar lessons. There are plenty of activities that will make you a better you.
Don’t you want financial security? Don’t spend all of your hard earned money. Make wise choices and open a savings account and/or place some money into a CD (Certificate of Deposit). Limit credit card debt, and pay most of your monthly spending in full. If possible, pay in cash or with your checking account. Always pay your bills before the due date so that you don’t incur late fees.
Express your feelings when appropriate. I’m sure you’ve always heard that communication is the key to great relationships. If you’re honest with how you feel, without getting angry or raising your voice, then there will be less resentment. Don’t place the blame on the other person. Make sure you try a sentence like this: “I feel sad when you don’t acknowledge my phone call or text until the next day.” It’s much better than saying: “Why can’t you call or text me back sooner?” We always feel the need to be loved or liked by people we know. Paying compliments is also something you should do every day.
Volunteer at a local non profit organization. It will make you a better person when you give your time, love and donations to charity. When you volunteer, you’re making your community better, and you’re spreading joy to those you’re helping. Habitat for Humanity, Second Harvest, Salvation Army, Dress For Success, Ronald McDonald House, and local children’s homes are places to volunteer. Go online and search for an organization to sign up and volunteer.
Sign up for a group sport. It helps with working together as a team, builds self confidence, time management, and more. It doesn’t have to be collegiate. It can be something like flag football, kickball, softball, tennis, ultimate frisbee, dance, swimming, soccer, ping pong, badminton, cycling, rowing, and lots more.